Posted in My Journal

It’s been a year?!

I can’t believe it’s been a year since the first impact of the pandemic on my life. I was finally able to work from home (WFH suits me best)! Even though I was spoiled and the office was literally at the end of the boulevard, the comforts of WFH appealed to my INFJ self for years. Before you ask:

  • I do enjoy the joys of lunching with a friend who’s also a colleague.
  • I do enjoy the office festivities such as a team potluck (remember those?!)
  • I do enjoy the cubicle setting where unexpected eye-contact or facial responses can spark up an uncontrollable giggle session among friendly colleagues who serves as witness to moments of madness
  • I do enjoy chatting with others in the break room (my Shih-Tzu @oreo2008 is more of a supervisor than a confidante)

I’m basically home alone with Oreo and some of the WFH comforts includes:

  • Traffic free commute
    • Unless you count a pile of laundry as obstruction but I avoid it like a familiar pothole on the road. I’ll take care of it on the weekend or at absolute critical times at night)
  • Ability to focus and “get in the zone” for a specific task
    • If I’m stuck, I can use my available resources to research instead of being an “asking machine”
  • No-sharing snacks and beverage zone
    • I love sharing snacks with others but right now, I’m not comfortable sharing with others just yet. Sorry to those who bring a box of donuts and I decline taking one. It’s only until I can get the vaccine. Once I do, lock up your snack drawers! I’ll be curious to learn who prefers salty, sweet, spicy, and all other types of flavor cravings.
  • Break time freedom (Yes, I’m that girl who sets a 15 minute timer to keep myself accountable)
    • I can enjoy my DVR on an actual TV, not a smaller screen that can has pop up notifications enabled

Last year has taught me a lot about adapting to change. I’ve been so complacent with my life that I lived it passively pre-2020. I told myself, “fake it till I make it” and I partially did make it.

Second Impact from the pandemic: I was part of a large wave of layoff. Half of my work history was built with this employer. It was an emotionally charged (40 days) countdown clock that started from my 33rd birthday to layoff day. Ranging from losing the motivation to wake up in the morning to difficulties to quiet the racing thoughts at night, I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster for the last half of 2020. Some days I needed some help with my anxiety and I got it from my therapist. I pushed a “pause” on my emotions and pushed “play” on my job search mode. Luckily, I passed a 3 part interview and landed an assignment before having to file for unemployment. It’s in the same field of work but a different industry. I’l forever be grateful that they’ve accepted me into their family as fragile as I was during the interview process.

After welcoming the New Year, I set a goal to place some emotional structure and boundaries for my mind. After all, thoughts are the stepping stones that lead the way of a path. The tricky part of is knowing when and what to let go and what to hold on: I think this is mindfulness…? I joined a book club. I tried a crochet kit with a friend. I listened to some books on Audible. I attended a small group at church before returning as a kids ministry volunteer.

Here’s to 2021, the Year of Recovery in all applicable sense of the word. Thank you to my husband, my family and my friends for being there for me. Knowing how you were there for me when I needed it the most means the world to me. I hope that I let you know in person at the time. If not, I’ll give you an extra big, awkwardly long hug next time I see you. The memories will continue to hold a special place in my heart for the rest of my days.

Thank you for reading this post up to this point! Take care of yourself and know that I appreciate you!!

Author:

This is the journey of exploring the curious mind behind @bonzcoloring... "Coloring with art supplies, music, and words in an effort to have a better understanding of all things in life." -BonzColoring

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