Author: @bonzcoloring

The vision of success? What a loaded question. I suppose it changes as I grow older.

When I was in my 20’s, success looked like a fulfilling career that pays well, a happy marriage, and having material things like a house, a car, and traveling for vacation at least twice a year. Now in my mid-30’s, I prefer success to be defined with adjectives such as peaceful, content, minimalistic, and simple.

In a way, I see success as a target board. Each day is an attempt to achieve it and there will be wins and losses. Some days will be closer to the bullseye while other days are a bit further. All are acceptable when put into perspective: tomorrow is another day of attempts towards success.

I’ll be honest. I’m great at helping others but could use some practice in asking for help. I’m someone who jumps in to offer help when someone seems to be struggling. With that instinct, I assume that others would do the same when I’m in need of help. Most of the time, it doesn’t work out that way.

I know, I know. Expecting others to figure out what I need is like expecting water to pour itself into my cup when I’m thirsty. Needing to be more assertive is something that’s hard for me because self-reliance is something that’s instilled into me from an early age. I love the autonomy that comes with being independent.

There’s a difference between independence and solitude. I enjoy being around another person or a small, intimate team of colleagues, friends, and family. Being independent is being able to make decisions that work for me, not traditions or societal “norms”.

Currently, I’m out of my comfort zone and coaching other adults and teen volunteers within the Early Kids ministry at my church. I’m so grateful to have a great group of volunteers yet I’m having trouble not being the “fixer” to every problem. Letting go, delegating, and supporting others instead of doing everything myself, is a HUGE challenge for me. I’m a hands-on person in ALL sense of the word. If I see a situation, I would jump in and figure it out. There’s no manual when working with children so much as being flexible even when there’s a curriculum plan in place. Some days preschoolers don’t want to do a Bible story-related craft and that’s OK! We can give the child materials for the craft to complete at home and engage with in-class games and talk about the Bible story as it relates to their 3-5-year-old selves, instead. As long as the child stays interested, they’ll engage in class.

Having shared this, it takes a special kind of adult with a growth mindset to be a long-term fit for leading a class of preschoolers. In the beginning days of leading a curriculum class, I found myself “less-than” when I couldn’t engage the child in the craft. My specialty was comforting babies and toddlers through separation anxiety by using different techniques involving soothing music and multiple toy alternatives. How can craft NOT be more interesting?! Over time, I let go of expectations and met each child’s emotional needs for the weekly hour of time that we had together.

Coming out of COVID, these toddlers may not have experienced social settings that involved peers or adults. Knowing that I struggled with the adjustment as an adult, it’ll take more time for a toddler to understand that we CAN share and we CAN be near each other and have fun.

All in all, I’m working on being more assertive and asking for help when I need it. Thanks for reading through this until this point! Is there something you’re working towards that could use a bit of help?

I can finally work with children and get paid for it! I’ve been a dedicated weekly volunteer at my local church in the Early Kids ministry. I’m that person who gets excited at Back to School sales because I love school supplies.

Getting to work with children during the week fills my soul and proverbial cup so much! I get to have multiple kids give me a BIG hug after I say goodbye to the Lead Teacher and aides. Who doesn’t love a child’s hug?! It just warms my soul. That’s the ultimate performance rewards in my book.

Also, it’s nice to be working with a team and not within an office cubicle with a computer. Getting out from being behind a desk is the BEST decision I’ve made in a very long time!

Much like the seven doors in the image above, I retired out of an accounting door and entered into the door next to it, education.

I’m happy at the risk of going back to school to pursue a different career. Most people I’ve worked with has said that there a many transferable skills from the world of accounting and bookkeeping that can be applied to the classroom. I wholeheartedly agree.

Working with children means there are a lot more adults involved: parents, guardians, colleagues, and administrations. Working in the corporate world of business has taught me to be a team player with the eyes of the bigger picture, whatever it may be for the top executive position holders. Merge those together and voila! You’ll see the three sections of a venn diagram.

Yes, children may take more patience, encouragements, and compassion. Adults need an advanced level of these traits because of each person’s life experience. At thirty six, I can say that I can a streak of stubbornness that can wear down anybody trying to convince me to try something new that doesn’t interest me. With that, it takes a separate set of skills to persuade adults compared to children or even compared to teenagers. Working with all three major age categories (adults includes seniors), they each have their unique perspectives to unlock much like a human mystery.

Personalities intrigue me. Personality tests such as the Enneagram (I’m a 2W1) and the Myer-Briggs (I’m an INFJ) gave me a sense of self understanding that I didn’t realize was available back then as a teenager. If I knew each person’s personality, I believe it’ll lower the risk of disagreements between two misunderstood persons.

Overall, I’m a big fan of calculated risk. It has taught me that proper planning, focus, and dedication can result in the most satisfying of outcomes. In life choices, calculated risk is my love language. Whatever fear factors that may arise during the planning process can be addressed. Sometimes, it’s a matter of having a conversation with the person that’s living out your goal. It can help to hear the reality of dreams. Usually, dreams don’t have many clouds. That’s where reality can bring in and these “clouds” helped me a lot in determining whether the risk is worth the rewards.

Figure out if the rewards is worth the risk, then go for it! I like to plan things all out in my head, then on paper, before sharing it with the person (besides yourself) that would be impacted by the risk the most. If the you can get past head-planning and paper-planning, the reward is something that truly means something significant for you.

So, brainstorm your risks! Is it something that’s been on your mind for a while? Is there something holding you back?